Miniscule of Sound: Difference between revisions

The '''Miniscule of Sound''' opened in [[London Borough of Hackney|Hackney]], [[London]] as The World's Smallest [[Nightclub]] in August 1998 originally in the changing booth of a disused outdoor swimming pool, ([[London Fields]] Lido in Hackney), as a parody of [[Ministry of Sound]]. The music policy allows anything that "ain't too warped or scratched" to be played and although entrance is free the doormen may eject anyone at any time if they even see fit to allow entry in the first place!

It proudly entered [[Guinness World Records]] in 2000 and shortly after was filmed for the Guinness World Records websites inclusion at [[Chats Palace]] close to its original birthplace. It also featured on BBC's Record Breakers but sadly long after [[Roy Castle]] and Norris had passed over to the otherside. The Miniscule Of Sound is regularly listed as one of the top 10 most unique nightspots in the world and has frequently featured in print, on TV and across t'internet.

Currently in its third built version, the nano nightclub has a maximum capacity of 8 to 14 people including the DJ in an area of 4 feet (1.2 metre) by 8 feet (2.4 m) with a flashing dance floor of 2 square metres. Capacity though is obviously affected by the average size of ravers present. The record capacity is 26, though not all of them could touch the floor at the same time.

As a theatre sideshow / comedy act / actual nightclub! visitors first have to negotiate their way past the [[Bouncer (doorman)|bouncers]], who, like their real life counterparts, control proceedings and may issue arbitrary decisions on who might or might not be allowed entry or offered preferential treatment. Bags and coats can be left in the cloakroom though failure to show a correct ticket on exit may mean a significant delay in return of property. A complimentary bar is sometimes run depending on the licensing regulations of the host event.

The club has travelled the world and is a regular presence at summer music and arts festivals from [[Glastonbury]] to [[Henley]] to [[Fuji Rock]] in Japan. And beyond.

In its time venue management have turned down many a supposed superstar DJ - famously asking [[Fatboy Slim]] for a demo tape before considering offering him a slot. [[Ninja Tune]] DJs have also been asked to prove their credentials before being allowed to take the decks, notably at their tenth birthday celebrations in London, at which "The 'scule" was the special guest arena.

In Australia the rebuilt club was "accidentally" thrown away after its final appearance at [[Big Day Out]] Festival in [[Melbourne]]. In [[Beijing]] the nightclub was rebuilt from scratch in the [[798 Art Zone]] to pop up around the city. After several TV, Radio and newspaper reports it popped up several times in Beijing before finding itself banned from setting up in public spaces previously agreed upon by the cities governing powers.

Representatives of the [[Ministry of Sound]] approached the Miniscule of Sound in 2001 and applied pressure to force the club to destroy its blatantly plagiarist logo and rename itself to avoid being mistaken for its arch nemesis superclub. However a press campaign orchestrated by Guff PR and supported by [[DJ Magazine]] resulted in the abandonment of their heavy-handed cease-and-desist order. The parties agreed that the Miniscule of Sound could continue to ply its trade as long as disclaimers on future publicity material clearly identified the [[tiny]] nightclub as not being associated with the [[superclub]]. Henceforth all publicity has included the text, "We're not big, We're not clever and We're not the Ministry of Sound".

Now in its umpteenth year of operation, the Miniscule continues to globe trot and play festivals and select events around the world when it's not being stored in the back of a van parked in a service station on the [[M25 motorway|M25]].

The owners of The Worlds Smallest Nightclub have a long standing dream to play in Japan, Siberia and Timbuktu and although weddings, birthdays and bat mitzvahs have all so far been catered for they are still awaiting a good old fashioned funeral.

UPDATE: Whilst The Miniscule Of Sound now regularly appears in Japan at [[Fuji Rock Festival]] each year in its own very popular Miniscule corner of The Palace Of Wonders area alongside The [[Mutoid Waste Company]] and Wrekon it is still waiting to be contacted by either a funeral or anyone from Timbuktu. <http://www.smash-uk.com>

Some notable names spotted "having it tiny" in the Miniscule over recent years have included: [[Mick Jone]]s from [[The Clash]], filmmaker [[Don Letts]], Asian Dub Foundation, [[Ian Brown]] of The Stone Roses, [[Peaches]], [[The Chemical Brothers]], [[Orbital]], [[Mike Skinner]] of The Streets, [[Lily Allen]], [[Boris Johnson]]!, all of The [[Sikh Warriors Of Goja]] and hoardes of others that the bouncers didn't know who they were - all have had to que like anyone else of course.

Guest D.J's have included My Bad Sister, [[Gaz Mayal]], The KenMichaels Brothers, Carl Loben, Bedlam, Sci-Fly, The Monkey Stomp Blues, Jims Vinyl Nasium, New Yorks Sim Cass, Miss Pink, [[Hexstatic]] and a whole load of others including [[Asian Dub Foundation]] who had to be forcibly removed from the decks for crimes against sound.

Some guy from [[Flogging Molly]] remains one of the few people to genuinely use the phrase "Dont you know who i am, this pass says i can go anywhere!" only to find his pass means nothing in the miniature world of the 'scule. And lets not forget the time that Boris Johnson had to be thrown out . . . .