Ishan Kishan on his time away from Team India: ‘I took a break as I wasn’t feeling right… no one understood my situation’

Excerpts

Did the T20 World Cup win sort of heal the November 19 heartbreak?

November 19… We had played such good cricket throughout the tournament. One bad game and we lost the final (50-over World Cup). It was heartbreaking. The game that day didn’t go our way. It was sheer bad luck. We had worked really hard throughout the year. But that’s cricket.

Even in the past, Kishan’s exclusion from the India squad or playing XI had kicked up debate. (File)

Although I was not part of the T20 World Cup team, I have been part of that dressing room in the past. I know how badly this group wanted to win a World Cup. As an athlete, when you give everything towards achieving a goal and then you don’t win, you don’t have an option but to keep your head down and start working from scratch. That makes sport beautiful as it gives you a chance for redemption. It was a very warm feeling for me to see players lifting the cup and the well-deserved reception they received on returning to India. I can understand the emotions.

You took a break from cricket due to travel fatigue. How are you feeling now?

I am in an excellent frame of mind. I’ve played in the IPL. I will be going to Mumbai, where I will continue to prepare for the upcoming season.

You lost your place in the Indian team and then your Central Contract. How did that affect you?

I don’t want to be sad about anything. I’ll keep giving my best.

What is next for Ishan Kishan?

Keep myself fit and prepare for upcoming tournaments. I am not thinking too much about the future. I want to stay in the present. At this point in time, I am only focussed on how to become a better and different player from what I was six months ago. I will work on a few innovative shots and on my wicket-keeping. These are the important things, rather than thinking about what happened in the past and what will happen in the future. I am waiting for the domestic season to kick off. I want to do well for Jharkhand and then let’s see.

What is the biggest learning for you in the last six months?

Nothing. There is no such learning. It’s a written rule that to make your comeback after a break, you have to play domestic cricket to prove your fitness. I just want to keep my head down and continue working on my game.

Do you want to play all three formats?

I see myself playing in all three formats. I have done well in T20Is, ODIs and Tests as well. I want to be part of all three formats.

Ishan Kishan in action on his debut Test match against West Indies. (File)

How challenging have these past few months been?

It was depressing. Today I don’t want to say that everything was fine. It was not easy for me at all. You go through a lot. Mere dimag mey ye sab chalta raha ki yaar kya hoga gaya, kyu ho gaya, mere saath kyu (Questions like what happened, why me). All these things happened when I was performing.

Why did you opt for a break?

I was scoring runs and then I found myself on the bench. These things do happen in a team sport. But I experienced travel fatigue. It meant there was something wrong, I was not feeling well or right and so I decided to take a break. However, sadly, barring my family and few close people no one understood that.

How did your family react to your decision?

A sportsperson can deal with what people on the outside are saying. What stresses you out is how your parents are taking it. How they are dealing with it. When you get to know that they are equally affected, it hurts you, and kills you from inside. But at that point in time, my family members were very supportive. They backed me and my decisions. They understood that I was not feeling well. They understood my situation. They never questioned it but they rallied around me and never left me alone.

Ishan Kishan plays a shot during the match. (File)

Why didn’t you turn up for Jharkhand in the Ranji Trophy?

I took a break and I think it was normal. There is a rule that if you want to make a comeback you must perform in domestic cricket. It is as simple as that. Now, it was very different for me to play domestic cricket as it was not making any sense. I was not in a frame of mind to play and that is why I took a break from international cricket. It doesn’t make sense that you take a break from international cricket and then you go and play domestic matches. Fir toh aap international hi khelte (Then I could have continued playing for India).

With Rishabh back, Dhruv Jurel doing well in the Tests and Sanju Samson also around. How hard will it be for you to make a comeback to the national team?

It was heartening to see Rishabh back in action. As far as competition goes, you love challenges and when you compete with all the quality cricketers, it enhances your game. And then when you make it you feel like you have earned it. I know it’s not going to be easy. But I feel competition gives you that feeling of satisfaction. I enjoy it. I don’t take any stress about it.