Why it is not okay to shout at your toddler

Parenting might often feel like a rollercoaster ride, especially when dealing with the unpredictable nature of toddlers. Their energy, curiosity, and occasional tantrums can test the patience of even the most composed parents. When faced with challenging behaviour, it’s important to remember that shouting is not the solution. Here’s why it’s important to avoid raising your voice at your toddler.

Yelling at a toddler can have immense emotional repercussions. Studies have shown that frequent shouting can lead to increased levels of anxiety, fear, and stress in young children. When a parent shouts, a child may feel scared or confused, which can hinder their emotional development and lead to feelings of insecurity. This emotional turmoil can manifest in various ways, including behavioural issues, sleep disturbances, and difficulty in forming healthy relationships later in life. A study published in the journal Child Development highlights that children exposed to harsh verbal discipline, such as shouting, were more likely to exhibit problem behaviours and depression symptoms by middle school.


Trust is the base layer of a healthy parent-child relationship. Shouting can damage this trust, making your toddler feel unsafe and less likely to seek comfort and support from you in the future. When children are consistently yelled at, they might begin to see their caregivers as sources of fear rather than safety, which can strain the relationship. Maintaining a calm and supportive demeanour helps build a secure attachment between parents and children.


A toddler's cognitive development is a critical aspect of their growth, and shouting can adversely affect this process. When a child is yelled at, their body releases stress hormones like cortisol, which can interfere with brain development and hinder learning abilities. High-stress levels have been linked to problems with memory, attention, and decision-making, which are vital for a child’s cognitive growth. Creating a calm and nurturing environment is important for supporting your toddler's learning and overall development.


Children learn by observing and imitating the behaviours of those around them, particularly their parents. When shouting becomes a regular response, toddlers may adopt this behaviour and use it as a way to express their frustrations and emotions as they grow older. This can lead to a cycle of negative behaviour, where shouting becomes a learned response to conflict and stress. Children who are frequently exposed to shouting and other forms of harsh discipline are more likely to develop aggressive behaviour themselves.


While shouting is generally discouraged, there are instances where raising your voice might be necessary, such as in situations where immediate safety is a concern. For example, if your toddler is about to run into the street, a loud, firm voice may be required to grab their attention and prevent an accident. But it's essential to differentiate between a sharp command intended to keep your child safe and habitual shouting as a response to everyday misbehaviour.