Inside job: Charles Assisi offers tips on how to bid on a better you

And so, some time ago, I imagined myself as an investment that a PE firm might inspect. Would I seem viable? What aspects would be deemed good, and what bad? What would be tagged “must be discarded” and what would be marked “to be scaled up”.

The exercise began with a scrutiny of my morning routine. There are many newsletters I subscribe to. Why were most left unopened? Was it because I didn’t think there was enough value in them? Was it a lack of time, or plain disinterest? Whatever it be, the PE firm argued, the unopened ones had to go. Because, on closer scrutiny, they were depleting my most precious asset: time. This asset could fare better if redeployed elsewhere.

My morning exercise routine, the division of my life that promised the highest returns on investment, could do with more time, for instance. Because there is no ambiguity about the ROI here, in health and energy. So, I made a return to a steadier gym and cycling routine. I am still out-of-shape, but it’s a matter of time before returns become visible.

The PE audit revealed other aspects of the day that ought to be streamlined. More of the non-core to be let go. Time sinks, such as the hours spent online, particularly on LinkedIn and X, were to be dealt with. Here, a grey area appeared. Letting go entirely would cause a loss to my “brand presence”. A compromise conflicted with personal choice: I could replace two time sinks with the less-risky Instagram, but this platform held no appeal whatsoever.

Getting off all social media would be detrimental in the long run, the firm agreed. Could we allocate the resource of time more tactically, using it primarily to build the personal brand, rather than for leisure and entertainment, where returns were low?

This raised a question we have all confronted: How much time is the right amount? As the management thinker Peter Drucker so eloquently put it, what cannot be measured, cannot be managed. The exercise is on and various permutations and combinations are being tinkered with. I am happy to report that my screen time has so far declined by 21% since the start of this year. Automating and outsourcing social media is being explored; finding the right balance here is a work in progress.

At each stage, I must admit, the PE approach has helped me leverage resources more efficiently. But there is a downside to such a cold approach. As in the worlds of business and equity, prioritising productivity and optimisation over all else, comes at the cost of relaxation and enjoyment. And these aren’t just crucial elements of the human experience; they should matter from a PE perspective too, because without these, there can be no creativity.

But the PE approach makes no room for balance. Success is measured in financial terms only — how much of a return is one accruing on assets — without accounting for the fact that those assets were built, at least partly, through ideas and inspiration born of simple downtime.

And, the PE approach it makes no room for human nature.

We are not machines. In implementing my success metrics, hitting the gym and staying focused on tasks, I could see how wound up I got. The cost was often a good night’s sleep.

What I mean to say is that life is nuanced. One can check all the boxes on a list, and still not feel fulfilment, and the promise of fulfilment is key. It is what differentiates a profitable product from a beloved brand.

So, think like a private equity firm is you are looking to cut losses. Just don’t lose sight of the fact that you are more than an asset to be optimised.

This can be done with a simple tweak (one that would outrage most of the PE experts I know): simply add happiness and well-being to the profit metrics. I’m tinkering with introducing a “quarterly earnings report” too, which I plan to share with key stakeholders. I expect the wife and children to be ruthless and mirthful in their assessment. I’ll just put that down as “fun family time”.

(Charles Assisi is co-founder at Founding Fuel & co-author of The Aadhaar Effect)